Let others do their thing; let me do mine.

I'm not smart enough to compete with ***.
Not friendly enough like *** that most people post that stupid chain message (about friends; and the more you get those, the more friends you have) on her Facebook wall.
I don't have friends like *** that will prepare sooooo much for her debut with that vehemently exerted effort.
Not beautiful enough to gain fame.
I am single with no boyfriend who shows he cares.
My family is not well-known; we're not even rich.
I don't excel that much.
I don't even know where I'm good at.
People... they judge me.

But them and to myself, I say:

I don't care whether or not I'm at the top. I don't care if I don't get as many friends as you have. Nor do I care if my friends are not exerting their all-out efforts. I still don't give a damn if people think I am nothing but a potato or a pumpkin or any other things that seem so useless. I don't care if you don't give a damn. All I know is that: I AM WHO I AM.

Let others do their thing; let me do mine. I've been in a state where I compared almost all my actions to other people that I forgot who I really am... that I forgot I am different from them... that I forgot I am unique in my own special way.

I want to rebuild the cathedral I once destroyed. I want to remind myself that sometimes it is necessary to listen to what other people will say but most often, you must listen to what your heart and mind speaks in harmony and to the voice of God that will definitely lead you to the path you ought to take. :)

Draft One.

And now I left you standing there...
Under the cold-lit night.
Even the brightness of the moon is nothing without you by my side.
Even the sweetest flower withers.
Even I don't know what I have done.

But please do understand...
But then, it's confusing.
For me to say I love you.
For me to say I won't give up.
And in one snap of fate,
all is gone.

All. Nothing.
I'm left with nothing.
Nothing but our sweetest memories.
Sweet memories that seemed to happen just yesterday.
Yesterday that seemed so long.

You were my lover.
I, too, was yours.
We were once so strong.
But I gave it all up.

I gave it all up not because I don't love you.
Or maybe I do.

In midair you hang
With nothing but my sweet lies.
In darkness I walk.
With nothing but tears on my eyes.

I love you.
But I love myself, too.
I love you.
But I guess it wasn't enough.
I love you.
But we're not who we were before.

Originally created on the 20th of October 2010 at 9:17 pm for someone whose heart I broke. Well, time pass. Feelings change, people as well. Recently, I realize that I did not really love him... or maybe I do. I don't know.

First Post.

Nah-ah, lemme try this first.

I once had 5 blogs created for different purposes, but, an instance came where I have to delete those, including some posts in my Tumblr account. Damn, right? I think twice (even thrice) before I created this new one. But since I want this stuff, I got over with the thinking and here I am... scribbling.

So, what made me delete my blogs? Simple. Someone asked me to delete my posts about him/her (and shit they're a whole bunch of posts, mind you). So instead of me navigating every single blog post, I decided to delete it all so no problem will occur. That dude...

I realized just now that he's so shitty. Yeah, shitty. But never do mind, a person like him is not worth my precious time.