A great guy is now with Him.

(c) Credits to the owner

John Bernard Ilagan, died of lymphoma cancer on March 30, 2011 at exactly 11:11pm.

JB. Naiinis ako sa'yo. Pwede magpaka-feeling close saglit? Okay, game.

     Hindi man lang tayo naging close bago ka umalis. Ni hindi man lang ako nakapag-share sayo, at ikaw sa'kin. Tangina lang. Naiinis ako sa sarili ko. Kung kinain ko lang sana pride ko nung una palang eh di sana kahit papano may mai-t-treasure ako ngayon. Naiinis ako kasi bakit pakiramdam ko sa lahat ng mga kaklase natin isa ako sa mga walang nagawa. Hindi ko alam anong emosyon 'to... hindi ko alam ang gulo. Punyeta naisip ko lang, may karapatan nga ba 'kong magdrama? Eh baka nga di mo na 'ko kilala eh.

     Sana meron, JB. Kahit di ako katulad ni Jennica na close na close na sa'yo. Kahit di ako katulad ng mga guy friends mo... sana may karapatan pa rin akong mag-emote. Emo na with bangs and eyeliner. Pero seryoso talaga 'ko. Tindi mo pre. Nagsilabasan na mga nahumaling sa'yo. Alam kong wapakels ka lang. Ganyan ka eh. Haha. Kahit ilang libo pa ata nagkakagusto sa'yo deadma lang. Galing mo pre. Pero naaalala ko rin, one time, tuwa ka with ngiti abot-langit sabay pagmamalaki mo sa gwapo mong mukha. Alam mo, meron din ako nyan. Sayang hindi mo nakita nang maayos... Meron din talaga 'ko nang ganyang pagmumukha, lamang ka lang ng isang paligo.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?

So I was out of our house but still  inside the gate. LOL. Whatever. But the thing is, I was getting all these clothes washed having my sister as my company. While I was at rest (and texting someone), my sister screamed!

Mayen: Ate tignan mo! May shooting star!

Me: Ano!? (runs at the place she's pointing)

Mayen: Bilisan mo! Ayun!

Me: (looks at the sky and saw this light--- sabay BATOK!) Bubu, airplane yan!

Nakakainis lang. At ako 'tong si inutil, naniwala naman ako. Sa bagay kung shooting star yun at tinakbo ko pa para makita eh di dapat hindi ko na yun naabutan. Kainis. So naisip ko lang, bagay sa post na 'to yung kantang Airplanes. Tragis. Hahaha.

Riz says: At talagang pinalabas ko pa sa kapatid ko yung laptop ko para i-blog. Hahaha. Bawi lang sa mga nawalang panahong kinain ng lechugas na pag-aaral... kuno.

They want to sneak a peek.

     I remember late last year when October's near its end, I promised myself to never let anyone set eyes on my precious page, but I guess circumstances like this do occur. As they say, no secrets can be kept secrets forever. For real? Yeah, for real, because in no time few of my friends will be setting foot on this island of hidden dreams, thoughts, ideas... in shitty short, hidden world. I got no hard heart for it, I got no hidden whatsoever you wanna call it, instead I don't care. I simply don't care. For months I've been too protective of my shell that I never let anyone touch it or even have a glimpse of it. But I guess, circumstances like this do occur.

    Pals, I have a great favor to ask: Aside from yourselves, never let anyone know this. Never mention a word. Forget that you have read this. You're free to leave comments, free to give back kicks, free to scrutinize, to correct... but never free to disrespect my privacy. Haha. Kinda scary, eh? Boo. And the reason why I handheld whatever time I gave you to explore over this is because I trust you enough to do so. I trust you.

You may not find this great or it may never meet your expectation... So I say... whatever. Haha! So people, let's party! Enjoy the time, it might be the last. And remember my words.

Bakit ngayon pa nawala? Punyeta.

(c) An original of Allen Manza, all contents belonged to him. 



Asan na ba kasi yun? Putragis. Badtrip.

Isipin nyo nga, bakit kung kelan natin kelangan ang isang bagay, saka naman mawawala?
Isipin nyo, bakit kung kelan napamahal na tayo sa iba’t ibang tao, saka naman tayo mahihiwalay sa kanila. Isipin nyo lang wag nyong dibdibin, baka mahulog kayo sa imburnal.

Ambilis ng panahon, dati maliit pa ko pero ngayon maliit pa rin. Shit.
Naalala ko pa, first day ng klase. Pumasok ako sa room. Tapos umupo.
First seatmate ko, si Rhyme. Nasa kanan ko siya. Ang weird ng mukha. Syempre getting to know each other. Tapos kinuha nya number ko, napaisip ako bigla, ibibigay ko ba? Pano kung modus lang to sa Manila? Pano kung bakla pala to, edi texttext kami. Bahala na.

Katabi ni Rhyme, si Sevb. Pogi. Pwede na. Haha
Katabi ko sa kaliwa, upuan. Katabi nung upuan, si Shaela. Late siya pumasok nun, sabi ko sa isip ko, kawawang nilalang, late na nga, ung pwesto pa nya, nasisikatan ng araw, parang bigla nalang may hihila sa kanya pababa, papuntang ibang dimensyon.

Nagpakilala na. Wala akong masyadong matandaan, maliban kay Jeph. Pinagyabang ung tshirt nya, kulay pink o, saka ung pangalan daw nya Jephertson. May T. Nung mga oras na un, gusto ko sanang sabihin sa kanya, sa presinto ka magpaliwanag wag dito. Joke.

Inarrange na alphabetical. Katabi ko si Carmen. Tss, ang ganda, sigurado ako mayaman ‘to. Feeling ko ienglishin ako nito anytime. Kelangan ko maghanda. Hindi ako nagkamali, inenglish ako, ano daw pangalan ko? Gusto ko sana isagot sa kanya nun “Insert British Accent Here: ‘Ehem, mah neym?. Hm. I’m Bahnd. James Bahnd.” Pero dahil sa takot na mapahiya, sinabi ko nalang ung totoo. Allen Manza, Di lang pampamilya pang isports pa. Si Carmen Batumbakal daw siya.

Wala na kong maalala.

Nagpalit ulit ng upuan, katabi ko naman si Riz. Shet. Ang ganda, mala anghel ang pagmumukha, gusto ko nga sana bigyan ng timba kasi umaapaw na ung kagandahan, e kaso ayun. Kikay ‘to panigurado. Parang miyembro ng power ranger. Nung 1st time ko siya nakatabi medyo natakot ako, feeling ko bigla nalang may susulpot na halimaw, sabay sisigaw si Riz ng “PINK PAYBAH!” BYE.

Nasa harap ko si Annabel, katabi nya si JepherTson, sa likod ko si Ruby, katabi nya si Clara. Wala sinasabi ko lang.

Ay nagkaron din pala ng group something nun. Sa English RARAble. Oyea. Sa Filipino, documates, Shiaela, Rhyme. Saka si Imman? Lol. Etc. La na ulit ako maalala. Sarreh.

Move on na sa 2nd sem.

First day ng klase. Delubyo agad. Documentary. Punyeta.
Sabi ko sa sarili ko nun, ay madali lang ‘to. Siguradong hindi kami pagpapawisan dito. Tama ako, hindi kami pinagpawisan, dinugo kami. Shit nakakamiss. Pramis.

Marlah at NJ. Naalala nyo pa ung pinuntahan natin si Hapi Joey, ung napahaba ng nilakad natin, narating natin ang pinakamalayong Mcdo. Ung sapatos ko, naubos, kita na ung kaluluwa.

Ley. Dahil sa’yo nakilala ko si Prince Mackaroo. Pota benta talaga ung mukha. Haha. Salamat sa lahat, sa mga kasiyahan inihatid mo di lamang sakin kundi sa buong A7. Drama potek. Napakatalino mong bata ka, siguradong malayo ang mararating mo.

Clarisse. Ang babaeng walang pahinga, di ko alam kung uso ba sayo ung tulog. Ano bang sasabihin ko? Wala akong masabi. Haha. Hanga ako sa’yo. “Insert my poker face here”

Ahm ano pa ba sasabihin ko? Yung group nalang ulit.

Cheatmates! Salamat sa lahat ng biyayang ipinagkaloob nyo sakin.
KonspetongPapelMate! Sandy. Salamat sa paggawa ng KP natin. Walang anuman Allen.
Debatemates! Woo. Mga halimaw kayo, antaray lang. April, Annabel, Ruby at Natz.
Conrado! Addie at Karmina, salamat sa pagbubuhat samin ni Jeph.
Volleyballmates! Team 2! Lupet nyo, syempre dahil sa leader natin at sa ating pagkakaisa!
TruthoorDaremates! Haha. Kung sino man kayo, kayo yun!

DotaL4Dmates. Mga hayup kayo! Haha.
Paderns, kung asan ka man ngayon sana masaya ka dyan. Salamat.
Jephertson, ingay mo! Haha. Ambigat.
Raniel. Halimaw ka potek. Paturo naman ng mga da moves dyan o. Please.
Gian. Madami ka lang alam pero mas malakas pa rin ako. Haha
Earl. Ay sows! Pati kakampi tinatrashtalk. Pero sa totoo lang ang saya mo nung swimming. Haha
Gab. Kapit lagi sa malakas! Haha. Biro lang, mahal na pangulo , salamat sa pagtitiis sa ugali namin. Pasensya sa aming kapangahasan. Isa kang dakilang nilalang.


Ano pa ba? Wala na ko maisip. Ung farewell message ko na. Aay.

Things got lost when I got my HD removed...

When I remember all those stuffs I lost just because I got my HD changed, I feel like crying. The photos, movies, videos, drafts, documents and every other thing you could imagine as contents of my HD. I couldn't express at full length the feeling of almost removing memories from your mind. Sad. It's so sad. :(

Wear this ring for me, would you?

"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

Ever since I was a kid I wanted to experience that one-of-a-kind moment in a woman's life. To be married. To have kids. To build a family. I don't know why, but I always look up to that day. It always seems cute and cool to spend the rest of your life with someone you could annoy. I always look to that day when I can marry him in churches we have never been before. I have been longing to spend each and every waking morning to find him snoring. I dreamed of perfectly tying his necktie for him and a whole lot more. Cheers to what I always kept deep within this fist-sized muscle enclosed in my ribcage. Cheers to my long-time dream! But I should never forget that before I get what I want, I need to sacrifice little things; need to do a little job; need to raise a little fortune; need to love myself a little less. I need to do these for me to remind myself that entering into such a commitment is not like one of those plaything relationships from before. Because involving yourself into some serious stuffs means sharing who you are to that special someone who will definitely do the same. Then we can say, love can lead to happy endings.

(c) All Rights Reserved. Content is original except for the quotation above. This post is intended to be passed tomorrow (March 14, 2011; Monday) for our English class as part of an activity.

When I met love ---- and it left me hanging in midair.

          It was a strange story of how love was broken even before it was formed. Mr. Reteche knew but he never suggested a gist to Zita --- a fine, fresh and soon-to-be-a-lady native of Anayat. He came from the city where he was previously with another Zita, and only assumptions were given for the reason why he left and what happened to them. Days, weeks and months have passed, Francisco Reteche remained a mysterious man and a teacher to where Zita of Anayat was studying. He was labeled so because of a letter enclosed in a blue enveloped that arrived two to three times every month --- with a gold design in the upper left hand corner --- and no one knew where or to whom it came from. Don Eliodoro, Zita's father, appointed Mr. Reteche to teach Zita how to be a lady for in no time, she will finally bloom to a perfect rose and will soon find her way in the city.


     A sudden emotion, bliss and romance was what Zita felt, but little did she knew that it was no more than that for Mr. Reteche. One night, the same blue envelope came for Mr. Reteche. He tore the letter and instantly put it to pieces once again. Zita rebelliously asked why have he tore it up if he will put it together again and he replied that someday, she too will do it and by that time, she would have understood. Unexpected minutes, hours and days passed, a stranger from the city came and looked for Mr. Reteche. Zita, then knew by the tone of their voice while she intently listened through the opening in the door that something will happen. The following day, she dressed herself in a usual Spanish dress, eyebrows penciled, lips are colored red and cheeks are with rouge.